Off to Puddletown!

Hey everybody. I’m flying off to Portland, Oregon tomorrow. Despite the fact that Portland has more strip clubs than any city in the US, I’m not going there to interview exotic dancers. After visiting Las Vegas I’m all “strippered out.”...

Open Fire

It’s the day after my nocturnal pity party. I somehow managed to get a few good hours of sleep and the bump on the roof of my mouth shrank to half it’s original size. After that good news, eating a decadent room service breakfast, and getting a good...

Fear and Loneliness in Las Vegas

It’s 2:00 AM and I’m looking out my hotel room’s bathroom window while I floss my teeth. As I scrape the gunk out from between my molars I look at the light beam streaking out from the tip of the Luxor Hotel. A cab driver told me that the...

Drill Bits & Kneecaps

It’s early evening and I’m playing blackjack inside a small casino off The Strip. I’m sitting at “first base” and the little old Chinese lady sitting next to me has been my good luck charm. When I’m not sure if I should hit or stand she usually...

Porn Slappers

It’s late afternoon and I’m taking notes for my upcoming book in front of the Paris Hotel and Casino on Las Vegas Boulevard. But I’m not the only person working “The Strip” today. Several Latino men and women wearing t-shirts proclaiming “Hot Ass...

Detox

Hi everybody. I made it back from Vegas in one piece and somehow avoided the poorhouse. I’m wiped out from the flight home and my body has to detox from the all smoke, booze, neon, noise, and humanity I subjected it too. As soon as I catch up on some work...

The Gang That Couldn’t Shoot Straight

It’s a weekday afternoon and my friend Phil and I have just walked onto a gun range. Phil and I usually get together twice a year and blow stuff up. For some strange reason I find it very therapeutic. Phil brings the guns, I buy the beer. To be safe, we drink...

Tony Bourdain – Sri Lanka!

In the next episode of Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations, Tony is truly taken in by the locals as they show him Sri Lankan culture and cuisine. Portuguese, Dutch, British, Indian, Arab, Malay and Moor traders have all contributed to the diversity of Sri Lankan food. ...

Chivalry

I’m eating dinner with a young woman at a restaurant on the Lower East Side. As the discussion winds though typical first date topics like work, hobbies, friends, and family histories, we end up on an interesting subject – chivalry. “When I’m on the...