The Hitman tries to make a reservation.
September 29th, 2004 by Waiter
Actual phone call……last year.
“Good evening the Bistro. How many I help you?”
“Halo, Halo?” (French accent on a cell phone)
“I’m here. How may I help you?”
“I am Jean Reno.”
“Yes?”
“I would like to reserve your entire restaurant for a private party tonight.”
Its 12:00 am and the kitchen is closed
“I am sorry Mr. Reno but the kitchen has already closed.”
“Do you know who I am? I am Jean Reno. I am a French movie star. I was in the movie The Professional. Perhaps you have heard of it?”
The Professional, a compelling story of a hitman finding redemption through the eyes of a small child, is one of my all time favorite movies. Reno played the Hitman. Of course, I suspect bullshit.
“If you are Jean Reno then who played the hero in “Le Dernier Combat?” (An early Reno film.)
“Pierre Jolivet.”
Merde. It’s Jean Reno.
“Sir, I am a big fan. If the chef was still here I would make him wait but sadly we are closed.”
“Merci.” Hangs up.
Godammit! I wanted an autograph!
(Swear to God it happened just like that!)
8 Responses to “The Hitman tries to make a reservation.”
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Talina wrote on 07/22/08 at 12:50 pm :
LOL! I have had minor celebrities wanting us to stay open all night or call me in the middle of the night but never Jean Reno! LOL!
Splunge wrote on 12/8/08 at 11:18 pm :
I had usher try and keep my statbucks open by offering to sing for us I hate how celebritys think that they can do anything because they ate famous
Ross Galbraith wrote on 03/16/09 at 4:04 pm :
The most famous person i’ve ever served was Donald Trump, Why the hell couldn’t it have been Hayley Williams!
Gabriel Gadfly wrote on 05/11/09 at 9:05 pm :
Heh. I’d have offered to cook him something myself.
Anonymous wrote on 06/14/09 at 7:52 pm :
That’s it. The next time I get to see him, I’m asking him where he called. The tension is killing me.
Fernando Campo wrote on 06/26/09 at 6:26 pm :
I think I would’ve been inconsolable, had I been in your shoes.
And I’ve yet to finish watching le dernier combat.
Michelle wrote on 08/27/09 at 6:34 pm :
I was serving at a restaurant and my customers kept saying that a man across the place looked like Richard Petty.. I proceed to go ask the man if he was indeed Richard Petty and said.. “I don’t even know who that is thinking it wasn’t him.. and it was him! so embarrasing..My boyfriend at the time thought this was crazy… because he is a famous race car driver.. but I don’t watch nascar! oh well!
Emilayday wrote on 05/15/10 at 8:38 pm :
I worked one summer at this family owned diner in Cape Cod, and a guy came in that looked really familiar. I went in the back and told the chef a customer there looked like either Kramer from Seinfield or the doctor in Back to the Future (I get them mixed up), and he thought I was messing around, I was like “I swear he’s someone famous!” So he went and checked and he was like it’s Jimmy Kapowski(???) whatever his character was in Taxi. He was there by himself, and didn’t make a fuss, and then he came back the next afternoon and I got to wait on him! He sat with his back to the door, although two other customers of mine asked me if it was Christopher Lloyd. He got a Shirley Temple (ha), a cup of clam chowder and a clam roll, and used cayenne pepper on both. Really cool experience!