by waiter | Aug 7, 2023 | Uncategorized
Last Friday morning, I took my father to Costco to get hearing aids. Pulling into the crowded parking lot, I said to him, “I bet there won’t be any handicapped spots.” “Why do you say that?” he asked. “Because there never are at Costco.” Whenever I...
by waiter | Jul 26, 2023 | Uncategorized
I was at work and about to go into an important meeting when my phone alerted me that I had a voice mail. It was my daughter’s summer day camp, informing me Natalie had a wardrobe malfunction. “Your daughter wore white leggings today,” the recording told me....
by waiter | Jul 24, 2023 | Uncategorized
A while back, Natalie and I were watching Ben & Holly, a cartoon about fairies and elves living in the forest, when she asked me if such fantastical creatures were real. “Most people would say no,” I said. “But who knows? Just because we haven’t seen them...
by waiter | Jul 20, 2023 | Uncategorized
As I drove to my parent’s nursing home after my workout, whatever invigoration I’d earned from my morning exercise seemed to be swiftly leaking out of my body. I needed coffee. Pulling into a 7-11, I gathered up the remains of my post workout meal – a protein shake...
by waiter | Jul 19, 2023 | Uncategorized
I like the gym I go to. They keep it clean; the equipment is well maintained, the staff friendly and they have a nice juice bar if your body needs a post-workout caramel flavored protein macchiato shake. I also like the variety of people who go there – old, young and,...
by waiter | Jul 18, 2023 | Uncategorized
Since my sister-in-law was joining us for our weekend sojourn to Pennsylvania, I was ashamedly forced to ascertain the cleanliness of my car. Like most parents of a tender tyke, the interior of my fine Japanese ride was littered with the detritus of childhood; empty...
by waiter | Jul 17, 2023 | Uncategorized
We were driving home from Pennsylvania when the low gas indicator on my dashboard began flashing. “We need gas,” I told my wife. “How many miles are left in the tank?” she asked. Using a switch on the steering wheel, I called up the diagnostics on my car’s...
by waiter | Jul 14, 2023 | Uncategorized
My daughter and I were watching a James Bond flick when she said, “Why do all the girls want to kiss this guy?” “Why do you think?” I said. “Cause he’s handsome?” “Maybe.” “But then he goes and murders people.” Shaking my head at...
by waiter | Jul 12, 2023 | Uncategorized
“Hi,” the man said, extending his hand. “My name is Robert. But you can call me Bob.” “Hi Bob,” I said, taking the man’s hand. “My name’s Stephen.” “You’re the new couple’s son.” “That’s right.” “How are they fitting in?” “So far, so...
by waiter | Jun 30, 2023 | Uncategorized
A while back, the 50’s themed restaurant in my town sponsored a contest – be the best dressed child in Eisenhower era fashions and win a free ice cream sundae for a month. My wife was all over it. “We’re gonna win,” she said. “Just watch.” I’m sure you...