It’s A Lousy Quarter

A lovely young woman’s coming by my place for dinner tonight and I haven’t got a clean thing to wear. Realizing my date won’t probably won’t appreciate funky smelling clothing, I drive over to the laundromat on the main street of my town. After...

Birthday Digit

It’s my birthday. So that means I’m getting a finger up my ass. I’d love to tell you that my upcoming anal adventure is connected to some kinky in-between the sheets fun commemorating the twelfth anniversary of my twenty-ninth birthday – but it...

To Boldly Go

“Good afternoon, sir,” the grocery store clerk says as I enter the supermarket. “How are you today?” “Fine,” I reply. Thinking the guy’s trying to sell me something I try maneuvering my shopping cart around him. That’s not so easy. The cart has a faulty...

Talking Head Deathmatch

It’s two o’clock on Wednesday afternoon and my brother and I are in his living room eating pizza. I’m on a diet and shouldn’t be carbo-loading, but the smell of pepperoni has overwhelmed my iron will. “Thanks for watching the kid,” my brother...